the attempt to create
creates exhaustion.
today I drew from the model again.
I brought an idea with me
which invited judgement
and comparing.
what I wanted to draw
and what I drew
were two different things,
and the split created exhaustion.
Last week, fresh from silent retreat
I just drew.
There is a big difference in the two kinds of activity.
One is receptive, the other active.
When I ponder what I have done in my life in terms of painting and living
the most successful
meaning enjoyable and full of learning
were done receptively.
the action was supported by a listening within for the path the action would take.
The Feminine Nature has been active in me longer than I have been aware of.
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