the button shopper

here's a funny thing

well, it seems funny to me,

the kind of funny that is the sweet spot 

of the cosmic joke

like when you begin something,

and you are so into it, 

like it is the most wonderful thing EVER

and......

like buying those buttons in that 250 year old button shop in Salzburg. 

(you know the one)

buying those buttons, choosing them from all those other beautiful buttons, 

and having support to do it, 

with the dear woman behind the counter........

for a sweater that never made it,

for a sweater that never appeared, 

despite my best knitting efforts.

kind of like so many other things....

what's so funny, you ask?

this blind love for the moment

this love of exchange

the beauty of it

the taste of it,

just for that.

it's a funny thing,

this kind of love.

 it never doubts that the project will not come to fruition.....

that it still lives me 

insistently

like it always did

from the beginning of time....

it's a love I can't do anything to stop.....

i won't go so far as to make it seem like 

Rumi 

left without Shams

but,

what to do with all this love?

well, finishing anything 

is beyond me now......

it is finishing me off.

it is no secret,

the joke's on me.